The Quran-Burning Story: 5 Steps to Looking Like an Asshole on the News

The closer the 9/11 anniversary got, the scarier and more confusing the news got. One story that has take the news media by storm is that of Terry Jones and the Dove World Outreach Center's plans to burn copies of the Quran as a "9/11 memorial". This story has been given so much attention, that the news has practically ignored everything else, including the floods in Pakistan. (I guess one crazy guy doing something hateful is a more sensational story.)

We've written about the "mosque at Ground Zero" (which is neither a mosque, nor at Ground Zero) many times and Islamophobia has become such an increasingly popular topic on here that Google Adsense has started to automatically generate ads for Muslim dating sites and Eid decorations.

But this...? We almost didn't want to even legitimize this story by writing about it. Plus it's so incredibly fucked up that we almost didn't know what to say about it. Think about if this story was reversed... if any group of non-Christians were burning copies of the Bible in order to "send a message" that they're sick of people... being Christian. Yeah. I'm sure that would go over really well. This is the most disgusting "memorial" to 9/11 that I have ever, ever heard of.

Since every news outlet in the country seems to keep giving this sicko the stage to spread his hate-filled ignorance, we felt like maybe it was time to take a look at just how hateful, misguided, and perhaps even delusional, this guy Terry Jones truly is. To fully illustrate that, here is your guide to the Quran-burning story, as told by headlines from the past few weeks...

Five Easy Steps to Looking Like a Total Asshole on Every News Outlet in the World

1. Rev. Terry Jones of the Dove World Outreach Center in Florida, announces that his congregation had planned a very special 9/11 memorial project: burning copies of he Quran.

• Koran-Burning Pastor: We Want To Send A 'Clear Radical Message'
• Rev. Terry Jones: Quran Burning "Very Necessary"
• Pastor Terry Jones says Jesus Christ would burn Korans, will go ahead with controversial 9/11 event
• Quran-Burning Pastor: We Are Definitely Prepared to Give Our Lives

2. Muslims all over the world hold rallies and events to protest the plan.

• Afghans protest Quran burning
• Muslims protest against US church plans to burn the Qur'an
• Quran burning threat fuels protests
• Indonesians protest U.S. church's plan to burn Quran

3. A ton of people speak out Jones and his plan, including the top U.S. commander in Afghanistan and the Attorney General. Then a ton more speak out... and more... and more... and more.

• Petraeus: Burning Koran Puts American Lives 'in Jeopardy'
• Attorney General Eric Holder calls Rev. Terry Jones' 'International Burn-a-Koran Day' 'idiotic'
• Pres. Obama, government leaders oppose burning of Quran, pastor says 'burn will go on as planned'
• LDS Church, Glenn Beck, Mitt Romney oppose Quran burning
• Even pastor’s old church condemns Quran-burning
• Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck speak out against Pastor Terry Jones' plans to burn the Koran on 9/11
• Franklin Graham opposes planned burning
• Vatican Calls Proposed Koran Burning `Outrageous and Grave'

4. Jones meets with the president of the Islamic Society of Central Florida (no direct affiliation with the NYC cultural center) who agrees to facilitate a meeting with the Imam behind the 'Ground Zero Mosque'. Jones then announces that the quran-burning plan is off in exchange for the moving of the mosque to another location.

• Pastor nixes Quran-burning, claims NYC mosque deal
• Rev. Terry Jones puts hold on Koran burning - for now, claims he won deal to move Ground Zero Mosque
• Koran Burning Cancelled, Pastor Claims Deal with Park51 Imam
• Florida Minister Cancels Quran Burning Protest

5. Both the Florida Imam and the NYC Imam deny that there was any agreement (or even any plan to make any agreement) to move the cultural center. Jones claims he was deceived and the Quran-burning plan is not canceled, but merely suspended... for now... maybe... sorta... he'll pray about it and let us know.

• US Pastor Calls Off Quran Burning, Hopes for Saturday Meeting with New York Imam
• Koran burning suspended; Imam says no deal to move mosque
• Quran Burning in Gainesville Florida Suspended but Not Cancelled
• Quran burning on again? Florida pastor says maybe

And now what...?

• Pastor Terry Jones' 9/11 Koran burn fuels copycats in U.S., violent protests abroad
• Florida Pastor Now Says No Quran Burning 'Ever' at His Church
• Gainesville turned upside down by Koran-burning threat, even after cancelation
• Dove World, Terry Jones site pulled down by Web hosting company

I'm sure any minute now there will be another new update since he's allegedly flying to NYC to try to get a meeting at the 'Ground Zero mosque'. Who knows what's going on right now, but one thing we do know is that wherever he is he's a hateful moron and it's sad that the world (including us) paid him any attention at all.

September 11th should not be about hate and division and protests like these. It should be about remembering those we lost and promoting peace. Burning a quran does neither. Terry Jones is a hateful man and I hope the media can stop acknowledging him. We're done.

Also check this out: Terry Jones timeline: It all started with a tweet